Tune into Episode 24 – DIY vs Coaching right here in your browser, find it on your favourite platform (head here for the links) or keep reading for a transcript.
Links mentioned in this episode:
Grab one of my free workbooks
Check out my free mini-course Tune In (on building awareness)
Check out the other resources compiled on the website
Kia ora, hi, hello and welcome to this episode of the Rules Are Made Up.
Today we’re chatting about DIY-ing growth or doing it yourself vs seeking support in whatever form that looks like.
Funnily enough, originally I had the idea to talk about this as part of my launch for my group coaching program, because obviously the idea being that it’ll eventually lead you, I’ll eventually talk about the program and encourage you to check it out and sign up for it.
But if you listen to last weeks episode or have seen announcements or my emails, you know that I have decided to not launch that program and to not run it for the time being, because I am trying to practice what I coach my clients on which is being mindful of my time and taking a step back and re evaluating what I’ve got on my plate and as much as I’m a “I need to do it all” kind of person.
Based on some of the things that I have got going on or that I want to be doing, like starting a family, I do need to take a step back and make sure I look after myself and my well-being, whether that’s emotional, physical, mental, all of the things so…
But then I still figured that this is a topic worth talking about because thanks to the Internet we have access to so much information at our fingertips, right, like you could just open up Google and type in mindfulness coach or type in how to be more mindful and you’ll get a lot of resources, right?
Depending on what it is that you want to be working on there is a truck load of podcasts, videos and blog articles, things like that that you can peruse, I think it’s the word I’m looking for here.
Right, there is so much information out there that makes it incredibly easy for you to figure out, to find it and to not have to pay someone to be able to work on your goals and to achieve it.
And that is especially valuable if you are in a position where you can’t necessarily afford to pay for additional resources, whether it’s things like courses or working with a coach, or anything like that, right? Because not everyone is in a position to drop a couple $100 a month, depending on who you’re working with and where you live.
And so having some lower cost options or free options right is incredibly beneficial and t’s also, I’d argue, a great way for you to experiment and to actually figure out what works and what doesn’t?
Because you can review so much different information and read books, I didn’t mention that resource before there’s so many books out there these days to that give you some tangible actions and advice that you can implement.
Right and doing all of that, is a way for you to build some self-efficacy right to build some agency over your journey, your growth and how you want to do that.
And that is incredibly important.
Now of course being a coach, I will tell you that there are some drawbacks of doing it yourself.
And I’m not just saying that because I’m a coach, I do also have the lived experience of having done the DIY approach early on in my journey before I ever became a coach, right?
I jokingly say that I’m a personal growth junkie, I’ve read I don’t know how many books, the bookmark list in my browser is miles long with lots and lots of articles in and my Spotify podcast library is insane.
Right, let’s not even talk about You Tube.
So I have consumed a lot of information over the years and because of I guess my personality just how my mind works, I’ve always enjoyed the research part of it right there looking for information, reading it up, comparing it, all of that kind of I love learning and absorbing information.
That’s partly why I enjoyed that that DIY approach so much.
But one of the drawbacks is that it can take a long time to find something that will work for you. Or to really figure out how to make something your own, because at the end of the day, big drawback of DIY is there a lot of the advice out there is generic.
Because it has to be.
Right, some stranger on the Internet cannot tell you exactly what you should be doing based on your situation, even if that’s what you know Google for and it matches up, what they say on their website that they can help you with matches up exactly with what your problem is. They cannot give you specific advice right and if they do, it’s a bit shady if you ask me.
And so one of the drawbacks is that you have to take all of the information that you’re consuming and figure out what applies to you and what doesn’t, and then experiment and tweak and figure out which of the five tips that you’ve read about would actually be the one that will work for you.
And the benefit of having a coach in that kind of scenario is that (especially a coach like me) is that I’ve gone through all of the information, so I’ve condensed it down into what could be applicable.
And based on individual conversations and weekly check-ins that we have with each other, I can give you personalized advice and coaching and feedback. We might still go and experiment with a bunch of stuff ’cause you might not even know what works and what doesn’t, right because you don’t know until you do it until you try it.
The time frame of how long it might take to figure out what works and what doesn’t could be quite condensed because you’ve got someone else who’s who knows the 10 things that could be applying in your situation.
And instead of you having to work through all ten of them, they may suggest three to try because of your individual situation, your unique circumstances, and based on what that coach has experienced in their own lives, but also what they’ve learned through continuing education and their qualifications.
So that that is 1 clear benefit of working with someone is the fact that you can shrink the time frame that it may take you.
Nothing wrong with doing it yourself and taking your time ’cause you don’t have to rush shit like this.
Now the one other benefit of working with a coach or having support whatever that looks like ’cause I am also a fierce advocate of working with a mental health professional and if you ever, ever have to choose from a financial or time constraint, for financial or time reasons.
You have to choose between counseling or therapy and a coach? The mental health professional wins every single time hands down.
Just so we’re clear on that, OK? Now that being said, a coach can still be beneficial and not just because they’ve been there, done that, or they can shrink that time frame, but also because they can see things that you can’t necessarily right.
A mentor of mine once said: “we’re often so close to our own shit that we can’t smell it” right and as funny as they’re saying is, it is actually true though, because you will not necessarily see things exactly the same way that someone who doesn’t, who isn’t in your brain will – the way you might phrase a particular sentence in a check in, you might not think anything of it but a coach can pick up on subtle things like that and ask you questions and just help you dig into certain things a bit more than you could on your own.
Now I am not going to sit here and tell you that you absolutely have to work with a coach if you want to get anywhere, or you know, really achieve all your goals.
You can absolutely, absolutely do that on your own.
If however, you would like some support and you’ve been enjoying these podcasts for the last few months (I can’t even remember how long I’ve been doing this) but if you’ve been enjoying these episodes, then you know where to go in the show notes to find out more about what working with me is like.
I have two coaching options available, they’re both weekly check-ins but one is asynchronous and the other one is with a live coaching call.
I also have a bunch of free resources available, so aside from this podcast, obviously there are also some workbooks available on my website and you just need to exchange your e-mail address to get one of them.
But I also actually have a bit of a compilation of some of the books and podcasts and other resources that have been really, really helpful in my own journey when I was going it alone, and even once I started working with coaches.
So I will link those in the show notes as well and I thank you again for tuning in, I really, really value your continued support of this podcast and I’ll chat to you again soon.
Until then, stay curious.